Dear New IEP Parent: You’re Doing Better Than You Think

 



Dear parent just starting out, 

You’re scared.

You’re overwhelmed.

You just walked out of your first IEP meeting with a stack of papers and a million thoughts racing through your head.


You want to be strong.

You want to do everything right.

You want to make sure your child gets what they need—but you’re not even sure what that looks like yet.


I know.


I’ve been there—I am still there sometimes.


But if I could go back and sit beside myself in those early moments, here’s what I’d say:


1. You don’t have to be perfect to be the perfect parent for your child

There’s no right way to navigate this. You will make mistakes, forget questions, and second-guess yourself. That’s okay. What matters is that you’re showing up—and that matters more than you realize.

2. This will get easier.

The acronyms, the paperwork, the meetings—it’s all so much at first. But you’ll learn. You’ll find your voice. And one day, you’ll be the one explaining it to someone else.

3. Celebrate the small wins.

It might be a single word, one new letter, or a day without tears. Those are victories. Don’t wait for a milestone to clap—every step forward counts.

4. You’re allowed to be emotional.

You’re not weak for crying in the car. You’re not dramatic for feeling frustrated or heartbroken. This is hard. And feeling deeply is just part of loving deeply.

5. You are not alone.

There are other parents walking this same path, wondering the same things, carrying the same weight. And many of us are cheering for you, even if you don’t know us yet.

Looking back, I can see now:

We were never failing.

We were learning.

And our child—our incredible, resilient child—was learning too.

So if you’re in that place right now—if you’re tired, unsure, or scared—this is your reminder:

You’re doing better than you think.

With care,

A parent who’s still learning, too


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